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| I was held down on 11/03/93 in psychiatric controls at the E.R. to a psych ward called Leauscom Unit in Bpt., CT. That was the first time I'd ever felt like I'd get killed by not cooperating with them. I was barely 19 years old with silk boxers and a small group of friends to my very band at the time - we broke radio 6/92, Plaid. I am the lead singer. That night, I screamed for my life against 12 or 13 staff - some with syringes and knives. As the staff left me naked, I stood in heart attack at the sound of a sword being sharpened outside my E.R. door. I yelled to open it and I cried. I sat (stood) in panic and shit (but none to shit) at the reality that if I tested positive for drugs, I'd be mutelated by the sharpened blade. I pushed the door with my heart rate at 250 bpm and I barely asked, "could I go to the bathroom?/can I leave?" I was near my time - death. I stood in this feeling for 72 hours with once my parents starring at me in anger. Why? I was lost on a highway, delerious and fell asleep at the wheel - a brush with death. |
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